Your Children’s Clothes

A common problem in a divorce is what clothes your children will wear at both houses. Over the years, I’ve heard these complaints:

• I buy the “good” clothes and my spouse never sends them back, instead my children come back with cheap clothes.
• My ex-spouse never cleans the clothes that I send.
• My ex-spouse ruins the clothes that I send.
• I pay child support, why should I have to buy clothes as well.
• My ex-spouse always loses the clothes that I send.

Although, there may be some validity to these complaints, your children’s clothes are their clothes.  Children have enough difficulties dealing with divorced parents their clothes should not be another issue that causes them anxieties.  Your children should not have to worry about which parent bought which clothes.  Once you buy any clothes for your child, they become the child’s clothes.  In other words, the children own the clothes, not you.

Here are some real life examples that I have helped my clients with:

Example:  The wayward sneakers.  My client complained that her son was returning after the weekend without his sneakers and now he had gym on Monday and he needed his sneakers.  I advised her that it would be best to buy an extra pair of speakers so that her son would always have sneakers and the child would not have to worry about not having sneakers for gym.  Now, both homes have a pair of sneakers, problem solved.

Example:  The teenage girl with her favorite outfit.  My client’s mother bought her granddaughter a special outfit for her birthday.  The daughter wanted to wear the outfit to school.  The father (my client) was afraid that his ex-spouse would not return the outfit.  I advised him to allow her to wear it to school, even though the outfit may never come back.  I explained that it was more important for his daughter to enjoy the outfit then to retain ownership.  I also advised him that the next time there is a special occasion at his house, that he could tell his daughter that grandma would like to see her wearing that special outfit that she bought her.  This way, the outfit may come back to dad’s house.  Several weeks later, there was such an event, and the special outfit came back to dad’s house.  Both daughter and dad were very happy.

David Badanes and the Badanes Law Office has helped numerous individuals with common-sense solutions to issues involved in divorces.  If you need an attorney to represent you in your divorce, call David Badanes and the Badanes Law Office today at 631-239-1702, email me at david@dbnylaw.com or visit our web site: www.dbnylaw.com.